December 14, 2012

The beautiful McCarley sisters in Sept. 2007 in NYC.
God bless them and keep them safe always!

I have lost friends and family members: my grandparents, mother, father and brother. But I don't think I could stand the pain of losing one of the beautiful McCarley sisters. It doesn't matter how old they get, they are still my babies and no one is supposed to hurt them.

On December 7, 2008, I stood next to my father and held his hand as we watched his only son and my older brother die. We had been at the hospice center all day with my brother's wife and four children because the nurses had warned us that it was probably Bryan's last day. We stayed in his room and listened to his labored breathing all day, wondering when he would take his last breath. Finally, in the late afternoon there was silence. Conversation stopped as we waited for Bryan to take another breath. He didn't. We all rushed to his bedside and I was asked to feel for a pulse. Daddy squeezed me hand so tightly as I tried to find a pulse on my brother's wrist, and then his neck. But there was none. I saw and felt the life go out of my father that night when he realized he had outlived his namesake. He told me three years later, as he laid dying, that it wasn't supposed to happen that way. Parents aren't supposed to bury their children.

Today I'm creating prayers and positive energy, and sending them to the people in Conn. who lost loved ones today, especially to the parents who lost their children. God give them strength and blessings as they go through the coming days, weeks and months.